Synthetic Wellness Ministry rewires the idea of care through a pop-surreal, techno-charged lens. It operates like a malfunctioning digital spa where neural recalibration, cosmetic exaggeration, and synthetic pleasure blur into one experimental system. Bodies become prototypes in permanent beta — tuned, stretched, and remixed through engineered frequencies and artificial touch.

This Ministry doesn’t heal; it modulates. It floods you with ASMR pulses, micro-ultrasound ripples, granular beats, avatar whispers, sugary glitches, and hyper-designed sonic textures that mimic serenity while short-circuiting it. Light, data, and vibration behave like mischievous technicians performing absurd rejuvenation rituals — joined by toy-like organisms, synthetic plants, and emoji-creatures acting as auxiliary “wellness staff,” each delivering their own exaggerated cosmetic and wellbeing interventions.

The result is a bright, uncanny wellness theatre — euphoric, confrontational, and playfully outrageous — exposing the surreal logic of wellness culture by amplifying it into a glossy hyper-pop delirium.